Welcome… I’m New Here! Critique for Paranormal thriller

[Dani]

Hi! I’m a newbie writer and so far I’m working on a debut novel called Out of Body. Thank you for your responses and helping me out! It’s a paranormal thriller so far I reached my goal of 10,000 words

 

[Sedayne]

Hi Dani,

Welcome to Litopia.
I'm glad you're happy with your first chapter and ready for critique, BUT I would urge you to take it down from this thread as it isn't secure or private from the rest of the internet. It can be found by anyone on a open search.

Critiques need to be done in The Lab where your work is hidden from general internet searches.

Also, to be fair to everyone giving their time and expertise for free, we ask a minimum of five critiques for other writers first. Critiquing for others is beneficial for your own writing and helps to foster community. When you get your own critiques returned it will feel more like a dialogue with people you have already engaged with.

Have a look at The Lab and watch this short video to see how it works. How to Use the Lab

Use this thread to tell us a bit more about yourself and where you are at in your writing journey. But take down your chapter to protect it from being misused by strangers or bots.

I hope you'll soon find your way around Litopia, and I'll look forward to reading your chapter in due course.

Best wishes,
Rachel

 

[Vagabond Heart]

Hi Dani, and welcome to the group.

Your book sounds fun. I look forward to seeing it in the Lab in the near future.

Xxx

 

[Claire G]

Welcome Dani xx

 

[RK Wallis]

Welcome aboard, Dani there are a few thriller writers here. Have you been on Litopia before? because I've read that type of beginning before (the one you describe in the blurb). I haven't read the pages yet.

 

[Dani]

Welcome aboard, Dani there are a few thriller writers here. Have you been on Litopia before? because I've read that type of beginning before (the one you describe in the blurb). I haven't read the pages yet.

I am new here! I have taken down the pdf because it needs to be posted on the lab (so I have been told) Do you happen to remember the title or author? I'd love to look it up and see how they handled the concept?

 

[RK Wallis]

I am new here! I have taken down the pdf because it needs to be posted on the lab (so I have been told) Do you happen to remember the title or author? I'd love to look it up and see how they handled the concept?

Oh Gosh! I remember the scene (and only read the first chapter), but this was easily 4 years ago because I remember reading it at my old house. It may still be in The Lab if its writer didn't delete it.

 

[Lakeland Waffler]

Hi Dani

Looking forward to seeing you around the colony.

Clare x