Thought for the Day Don't worry about not fitting in. The things that make people think ...

[Paul Whybrow]

Don't worry about not fitting in. The things that make people think you're weird are what makes you you and, therefore your greatest strength.

Birgitte Hjort Sørensen

 

[Lucìa Arrivato]

This is great advice, except for one thing: Usually those who say this live in a bubble. They usually come from a place of being well liked, respected, and accepted in most circumstances in life. For them, having this mindset is a show of maturity and having it altogether. For them, it's just a matter of brushing it off because they know they have their family, their friends, their tribe, to fall back on. They don't truly understand the harsh reality of having never fit in. For those of us who've never had that, life is very painful.

I've never been accepted by society. My own family rejected me since infancy. This, of course, set the tone for my entire life. You want to argue with me on that? I'll be more than glad to give you a crash course on the psychology behind this, but it would make this longer than what it already will be.

When I first entered the workforce, I was fired from every single job I ever held, about 20 jobs. Why? By being myself. All I ever did was stay quiet, do my job, and be myself. That doesn't really work for those who are really different.

As a result, I became homeless 4 times. The nightmarish hardships I've been through throughout my entire life because of this and other mind breaking experiences have truly taken me past my limits. Just as the body has its limits, so does the mind.

I'm 68 and have been on Disability since 2004. My disability? Simply being me. Society considers me as being flawed because that's how the so-called experts have painted us. I'm proud of how God made me. My difference has been such an amazing asset and blessing for me, but because the world doesn't see it that way, I, and others like me, suffer the hardships.

I don't like hypocrisy of any kind, even as a very young child, I saw through the superficiality and shallowness of people and society as a whole. I write about this a lot. My tagline as a writer is: I love blowing people's minds with simple truths.

It's great that you believe the way you do, but you need to see, as well as respect, that there is another equally valid perspective.

 

[Kim]

THIS x a gazillion! My mother was very much 'keep up with the 'Jones' and was constantly clutching her pearls about what people thought of her and the perception that we had to be this perfect vision of a upper middle class Southern family.
And oh boy is THAT a lot to unpack! I was well into my 30s (I'm staring at 60 in a few months) before it finally hit me. Why, for the love of tiny kittens, should I give a sh*t what people thought of me? My mom passed 3 years ago and while I'm finally free of her, the judgement and criticism of everything I did/said, etc is taking a long time to work off. Writing has helped. (ok and stabbing fabric with a sharp, pointy object!)

 

[Lucìa Arrivato]

THIS x a gazillion! My mother was very much 'keep up with the 'Jones' and was constantly clutching her pearls about what people thought of her and the perception that we had to be this perfect vision of a upper middle class Southern family.
And oh boy is THAT a lot to unpack! I was well into my 30s (I'm staring at 60 in a few months) before it finally hit me. Why, for the love of tiny kittens, should I give a sh*t what people thought of me? My mom passed 3 years ago and while I'm finally free of her, the judgement and criticism of everything I did/said, etc is taking a long time to work off. Writing has helped. (ok and stabbing fabric with a sharp, pointy object!)

Tell me about it. I'm nearing 70 and I'm still dealing with the trauma of having been raised by the egg donor who was a malignant narcissist and the sperm donor who was a pedophile. Childhood trauma is a very difficult thing to get over. Don't be too hard on yourself if you find you're still having issues. You're normal.